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| So I have a week and a half left here in England. I'm not sure how I am supposed to feel. Maybe this is because I can't understand the mixture of feelings within me right now. I love it here, but I love it other places as well. I think that it is just scary to me that when I leave here, I have no way of knowing whether or not I'll return ever. I don't want Oxford to end forever in two weeks. I want to know that this just another place for my life to thrive in.
On the other hand, going home means seeing my family, seeing Katie, and seeing American fast food. All of these I miss a lot. I miss my church family as well, and can't wait to be amongst them, even if I don't agree with everything that they do. Over here I've come to finally realize that like all families, disagreements are worse if they go ignored. Also, disagreements within the church family doesn't make you love them less for being opposed to you. That's hard for someone with my pride to handle. I feel like whatever happens when I return, it will be new, different, and exciting.
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| "Sometimes it's a good day to die, and sometimes it's a good day to have Breakfast...."
~Thomas from Smoke Signals
There is in fact a lot of wisdom in that statement I am discovering. It may be worth dying to win certain battles, but why fight on small issues? I must say to myself, "Not everything is that dire Will. Your christian love is more important than winning every argument, or even showing that you are right. Silence and stillness can be good too." I guess that in such a loud world, with so much passion, and so many reasons to die, it's just hard to sit down and have breakfast. Also, I just miss Katie....
-Willard
EPHESIANS 1:17
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| Ok so I'm not actually reading War and Peace, but you guys were really impressed at first weren't you?? So life has been a lot of studying and working lately at 10 Cantebury Rd. I didn't think that they were allowed to do that to you during study abroad. Oh well, I guess that I am here for school. My main qualm right now is the fact that around me I see such a strong since of christianity, but then when it really breaks down what is right is really relative. This disturbs me. I see rules that I may not agree with as things I obey because I promised to do so. What does it say to those around me about my Christian faith if I say I will obey a hard teahing or ideal, and then when I become tempted I resort to, "Well, it's not really a big deal...." My promises and word are empty. I ignored these rationalizations of my peers, and gave them the benefit of the doubt, but they're starting to get out of control. I'm not sure what to do. I don't mean to sound self-righteous, but sometimes I feel like Elijah, and that I am all that is left of God's profits when really there are a n enormous mount in hiding. It's aggravating frankly. I guess I just miss my family, my youth group, my camp friends, and Katie. I love England, but I also am seeing a lot of people taking advantage of the circumstances. It sickens me. How can we worship amongst such corruption, or do we do that already at home, and I just don't realize or know about it. It wouldn't surprise me if I was just being naive.
I am going to Salzburg in two days, and then onto Prague. I'm pretty excited. Everybody says Prague is gorgeous, and even more important, cheap. So, yeah that's my week, anyone care to compare. I need to stop complaining, I have it so well. One would think that I would be satisfied, and I am resolved to be so. Jillian, if you read this far into your brother's rantings, know that I miss you. I hope you get to go to Italy with me, that would be incredible.
-Will Powell
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| It has been a desperately long time since I have done this, but
looking back at my entries, it seems that I use this site only to
complain about things. Recently life has afforded me little to no
reason to complain, or maybe I'm just becoming wiser? Is that
possible??? I just got back from Normandy beach in France, and I
have had a lot of thoughts about that. But yeah, English
life is pretty superb. There are some ways it could be made
perfect, but it is beyond what I could have anticipated.
God I think has been trying to drill into me over the past few
months that He is in fact smarter than me. How stupid and
stubborn do you have to be to try and learn that lesson?? Well,
if anyone actually wants to know more about my life let me know.
I am so thankful that I'm not condemned for lacking perfection. 1
Samuel 16:7
~Willard the illustrious Fourth
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| Hmmm..... So life is mundane. Not even that, it is (if possible)
MORE mundane than normal, making it mundanely mundane. I'm not
usually a pessimistic person.... ok, well I am sometimes I do distort
reality. Talk about not having a Telos, that is definitely the
case right now. I am getting tired of sitting at home, carting
people and animals around, raising sheep, and repairing cars. I
have summer work I should be doing, or even preparing devos for camp,
but all this has sparked no desire in me, if anything it has caused me
to despair. I feel like Paul only instead of with sin, it is
homework. The work I do, I do not want to do, but the work I
should do and want to do, I do not do. Do..... there I had to
write it one more time. According to the waitress the other day,
I look like Jillian's younger brother. Considering that I am
three years her senior AND am in college, this is slightly
irksome. It is not however the first time this has happened, and
I have realized that I am slowly beginning to cope with it when people
make that remark. I obviously not only look it, but send off a
less than mature vibe compared to her I guess. This stings me
more. I am becoming frustrated, Camp or Jesus come soon!!! I
guess also like Paul I need to continually beat my body, and make it my
slave, not the most fun process or best biblical analogy given, but it
is easy enough to understand and retain its message. Thanks for
the directness Paul..... Pharisee!! Well this was fun I ought not
to forget the freedom Xanga brings to a soul
-Willard
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